[I grabbed one of Archie's sweatshirts and this annoyed him to the point of snapping at me. We come in later in the car, after I have changed shirts.]
Archie: I'm sorry for yelling.
Me: No problem. I'm sorry. And I changed the shirt.
Archie: But I swear to God, if you ever wear one of my sweatshirts again, I'll [beginning to laugh] set you on fire!
[At IHoP, with Charlotte, after we've dropped the twins off at a slumber party. Our server has introduced himself. His name is Rolf. We've ordered and received our food.]
Me: When you see Rolf, can you ask him if I can have my glass of milk?
Archie: Oh, you want your milk, huh? You have water. What are you complaining about?
Me: Whatever. But you'll still be paying for it and I will not get to consume it, so you might want to bring it to Rolf's attention.
Me: Every time I say his name, I want to break into a stirring rendition of "16 Going on 17". Especially since it's raining outside.
Me: I guess my "Sound of Music" reference fell flat.
Archie: Oh. I was actually thinking of "The Muppet Show." I don't think Rolf would have taken good care of her.
Me: Of course not. Because he was a big Nazi!
Archie: But so good looking! And blonde!
We watched this movie called "Microcosmos" last night which was really cool and gross and neat-o -- if you like seeing bugs all in super-close-up, which we apparently do. Charlotte also loved it a lot because she has a lot of affection for the insect kingdom. Unfortunately, there was a bit of the porno to it -- which is always a risk with a nature documentary. There was the ladybug humping scene, which made me wonder if that was a Sapphic scenario, what with them being LADYbugs. Oh, I crack myself up.
Then there was the wocka-chocka snail scene. Cha asked, "What are they doing?" as the snails started to get veryclose to each other. Then she said, "Look! They're hugging! That's so cute." Then as they began to explore each other with their snaily appendages, she exclaimed, "Ooooo, they're kissing! Yuck! Bleeeech!" Archie and I were then amused when the snails toppled over from their passion.
Of course, they did so very slooooowly.