Archie had a physical for an insurance policy today. The nurse or physician's assistant came round and drew blood and took his blood pressure and had him fill out a health questionnaire. But Archie was concerned that this woman was coming to the house. "It might just be a scam to look around and see if there are any clues to my lifestyle choices that could affect my health."
I said, "Oh, God -- wouldn't it be hilarious to have a bong on the coffee table and scatter hypodermics all around and you could down a shot and chase it with a beer when she gets here? At 10am? That would be awesome!"*
Sadly, we did not do this. It was all very boring and calm.
*(We don't own a bong or have any needles. And, while we do have some booze, we don't drink at 10am. Ever. Although all bets are off come 10.30am.)